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It's a nice arrangement. They get free maintenance and I get to never grow up.I like working with kids. Generally I have a lot more respect for them than the arrogant and pretentious beings they turn into when they grow up. They're straight up; they value every moment and unlike my wife, my parents and the rest of the adult world, they love my imagination.

A red-headed pint sized linebacker slammed into my left leg. "I love you, Uncle Tom." "I love you, too, Nicholas Robbins" I said as I fought for balance. A roving pack of 4 and 5 year olds greeted me as I came onto the playground. That first five minutes when I arrive at St. Maddy's is probably the best time of my week. Since I only come on Friday afternoons, it's a big deal. When I walk in the gate the whole playground erupts with choruses of "Uncle Tom! Uncle Tom!" Kids come running from all directions to hug my neck and drown me in affection. Just the thing to shore up an old brokendown ballplayer's spirits.

"Well, I see you still haven't been able to get a real job. What'sa matter, no work out there for well off white people?" "Oh there's plenty of work," I replied "you've got your positions in savings and loan fraud, television evangelism accounting, your odd job for the military industrial complex keepin' the nigras down on the the plantation and of course I could probably get on as a South African policeman or an Israeli soldier, both respected jobs for white people but...I think I'll just stick to my original career path." "Oh really," she laughed "well tell me little boy, what do you want to be when you grow up? Not a basketball player I hope."

I ignored the jab. "No, I've given up on that, too old, now I want to be watermelon taster for the NAACP or maybe talk to Gladys Knight about joining the Pips...you've seen me dance?" I did an off-balance buck and a wing. We both dissolved into laughter. Tell me," I asked "how's the Pope?" I know just where to get her. She's a practicing Catholic and a little embarrassed about it. "Hey, did you hear the one about what happened when the Pope went to mount Olive?...Popeye beat the hell out of...ouch!"